From Issue 3.6 - Summer 1997
To all my gentle readers, Top, bottom, switch, and the yet uninitiated:
Summer is here! The night is hot, stuffy and filled with an air of restlessness. Lounging around wearing fetish fashion in 95 degree heat seems just about as appealing as wresting an alligator possessed by Jesse Helms.
So what's a good kinkster to do in such SM adverse environmental conditions? This month I'm giving you all a break from your lessons. Instead, let's talk about some summer fun ideas -- just think of me as the Perv Summer Camp Activities Dictator... er... I mean, Director.
For those of you with a case of summer adventure cravings, go camping! Make sure to pack extra tent pegs, rope and insect repellent. With the great outdoors as your dungeon, you'll never have to worry about having enough overhead clearance to swing your flogger. Stake your lover down with the pegs and the rope. Hope that they're not on an ant's nest. Give "outward bound" a new meaning... but I don't think mosquitoes count as needle play.
For those who prefer a more exotic adventure, go to Hawaii! I found happening fetish scene there, and they believe in air conditioning. The Goddess Pele is the ultimate edge-player when it comes to fire play, so why not add a "human-sacrifice-at-the-mouth-of-the-volcano" scene to your repertoire? I just know that Hawaiian print latex muumuus will be the next big fetish craze! Rush out now and be a trend setter. Or, go to the local fetish hang out, sweat in your leathers and laugh at the people in Hawaiian print latex muumuus. Secretly, they enjoy the humiliation, so you'd be doing them a favor.
For those who like things simple, try a classic beach scenario. Bury your bottom in the sand, then sip a tall cold drink in front of them. Sculpt the sand pile into creative shapes. Go ahead, play god! Mold your sub into whatever you want her or him to be. Turn him or her into Jesse Helms, Barney, or Barney and Jesse's love-child wearing a Hawaiian print latex muumuu.
For more adventure, go snorkeling in a spandex dive suit or your latex cat suit. Think of the mask and snorkel as a new type of gas mask to add another dimension to your claustrophobia. Are you into terror play? Then try this in shark-infested waters!
If you are you a true sadist, visualize a latex mummy bag, the Central Valley, and no air-conditioning....
If these ideas don't suit you, I guess you'll just have to draw your curtains, turn on your air-conditioner, and learn to sleep through the days. Or, move to San Francisco, where we don our leathers to keep from freezing our tattooed and bruised rears off in the thick August fog.